With Thanksgiving coming up next week I thought I'd get requests for the secret family recipe for Aunt Sara's Famous Sweet Potato Casserole or the best time of day to hit up The Cracker Barrel for their tasty Thanksgiving offerings.
Instead I got a lot questions about Black Friday. Here's one from Elliot the black lab in Cincinnati. Elliot writes: "I'd like to get my parent's one of those doorbuster flat screen TV's on Black Friday for Xmas; have any tips for a dog like me to make this happen?."
Dear Up a Creek without a paddle,
Before you can even think of getting to the store you need to quietly escape while your owners are out of the house. It helps to have accomplice to 'conveniently' leave the back door slightly cracked so you can get out.
You are going to need a alibi in case anyone comes looking for you, like this guy. (For those of you reading this instead of working - the clip does contain some adult language,... just looking out for you).
Since you are going to need to take the bus you are going to need a disguise. You can start with a scarf and pair of unassuming sunglasses like my friend here:
If people ask where you are going just tell them you are going to "Go See A Man about a Dog" (a euphemism for concealing one's true purpose). Anyways, I learned this one from from my British friends so people will be so confused by its meaning they will leave you be.
Lastly, get there as early as possible as it gets crazy out there; expect it to look something like this:
Best of luck - pick me up a Starbucks Holiday Blend (the whole bean kind, not ground); it's for Bean's stocking!